Is There a Book, Blog or Magazine for that?

When I was pregnant for the first time I was 21 years old and my experience with babies and children was limited to my younger sister who I honestly didn't take a huge interest in during her younger years. I would later regret that as she was a very difficult baby and probably could have taught me something about what I had coming to me with my son. When my daughter (now 3 1/2) was born I was the expert. I knew everything that the internet had to offer. I could tell you about nutrition, learning, emotional development, parenting styles, the latest greatest and safest products. I was a veritable encyclopedia of baby knowledge. And hey, that's all well and good if your baby fits the books description. Mine did and at that point I was convinced they all did. I scoffed at parents who said they're children were difficult or different because I just assumed they were doing something wrong or not informed well enough. Yes, I was that mom. Autumn proceeded to potty train like a dream, listen to what she was told and eat all her veggies at dinner.  And then along came Jude. From the start he was lodged in my hip, weighed 10 pounds 5 ounces and had the loudest voice in the hospital. No matter, he would fit the books just like his older sister. So home we went, me a little rusty on all the baby knowledge but confident and armed with Google, Babycenter.com, and the army of  facebook moms who would answer all my questions. It took about 3 weeks before I realized my son is not a google baby. There is no issue of parenting magazine to explain him or his needs and not a single one of you facebook friends has exactly the right answer. While the support has been much appreciated I was still left confused and frustrated. I checked out the biggest book at the library about babies. I looked into methods that I was against and ones that i wasn't.  I was ignoring the only two places that had the answer to raising Jude. The hearts of my husband and myself.  Currently, along side his many other challenging quirks, Jude has been screaming like something out of a horror movie for what seems like and may be hours in the dark hours of the morning. After posting about it and concerning myself with allowing him to sleep in our bed to bring him some comfort I realized that in the end they are all different. Nobody can tell me what the right thing is for Jude....except maybe Jude. I won't be making a new years resolution this year but if I had to make a change I guess that it would be to open my heart a lot more and to encourage others to do the same. Babies and children grow up and leave so fast that I cant see shoving them into a category, a website, a book or a set of rules. I just need to learn that it's not about where they sleep, what they eat or what kind of sippy cup they use. Love is what raises them, and I won't ever need a book to teach me how to love.